Friends From The Internet

Join us, your friends from the internet, in a questioncast! If you'd like to be on the next one, send your question to! If you'd like there to actually be a next one, share this around so more people will listen to it and we'll actually get questions!

If you have the time, write us a review on iTunes using this link. iTunes reviews are a big factor in discovery metrics, and all it takes is a sentence to help us grow!

This Week's Major Skews:
Put More Pasta In Ya Books, BITCH.
If Your Socks Aren’t Lickin’ The Beans
With Major Life Changes, It's Always Itsudatte MAI PEISU.

See you next time, kids!

Direct download: FriendsFromTheInternet_009.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:28pm EST

Gary and Kole from [the way, way more popular than us] Bonfireside Chat had me on to talk about the Dark Souls 3 DLC, and it was so rad that we had to talk about it for 4+ hours!

The podcast was. I mean. The DLC was kind of whatever for a lot of it. As described below!

"Gary Butterfield, Kole Ross, and Dave Riley talk about the remainder of the Ashes of Ariandel DLC."

Category:general -- posted at: 10:42pm EST

Gary and Kole from [the way, way more popular than us] Bonfireside Chat had me on to talk about the Dark Souls 3 DLC, and it was so rad that we had to talk about it for 4+ hours!

The podcast was. I mean. The DLC was kind of whatever for a lot of it. As described below!

"Gary Butterfield, Kole Ross, and Dave Riley talk about the Ashes of Ariandel DLC for Dark Souls III, and we cover everything up through the Depths of the Painting."

Category:general -- posted at: 10:41pm EST

In this episode we go full-on #Bartleby because, given the dour prospects of our already ruinous country, we'd really Prefer Not To. But the world needs humor (maybe!) and, failing that, I guess speaking erratically about a TV show will have to suffice!

(but you can skip to around 30 minutes in if you want to skip the political talk)

Oh the Hamptons, oh 2013, it was a simpler time (not really). Already, reports of nipple-rubbing displays of dominance are resounding up and down the coast of Montauk, and the amount of shirtless Jack in this episode is, frankly, unprecented. But hey, what can you do? With a ButterPersonality like that, you gotta flex those pythons whenever you can, especially when the Wee Baby Coerl seems in direr danger than ever before--menaced as he is by a certain Surprise Englishmun.

(cast Blaster, Couerl! it'll reduce that lickspittle twerp to 1 hp and then daddy's rock-hard nips will finish the job!)

So look, things Hamptons-side aren't so hot either! Given Aiden's Perceived Dubba-Double Cross, he's clearly auditing a couple classes at the Tony Almeida Revenge Junior College, only to all-too-soon learn that 3 credit hours of yelling "MICHELLE!" isn't going to suffice when he's thrown deep into the battle-belly of Conrad's finest Les Mis ensemble rendition you've seen this side of that movie where Russel Crowe pretty much just spoke-sang all his lines.

Speaking of the French Revolution, Margaux's Dreaming a [comparatively low-aspiration] Dream of having her publishing magnate father show up in America for the launch of her magazine. When--BIG SHOCKO--he decides his daughter's distribution debut is beneath him, Margaux stumbles around the launch party in a daze and stammers out some line about him being unable to attend because he broke his "jambe" getting broken "dans l'avion"--basically, the adult version of "my dad, the fireman-slash-president, couldn't come to give a lecture to our social studies class because he's in Canada fighting the Nazis"--and crosses her petite fingers & toes that nobody remembers their high school French well enough to call her on her absurd and easily rebuked lie.

Regrettably, listeners, it is Margaux's cruel lot that her life be as pathetic as it is fictitious, and so it should come as no surprise that not only did Victoria minor in French during her time at Vassar, she also possesses the bat-like hearing and carnivorous blood-hunger of a true Vassar alum. Thus, with the scent of wounded-daughter in the air, Victoria homes in and whispers to a heart-heavy Margaux a mild set of words that just might patch the wounded enfant abandonné's irreparably père-damaged couer that being: "you gotta use that femininity; like, with your body; the sensuality, I mean; it can, perhaps, be a weapon."

And thus, confident with weaponized femininity like when you pick up a rocket launcher in Metal Slug and it goes all "RAWKET LAWN CHAIR" and you're like "wtf this guy smoke before he do this recording??? :o" Margaux strides right out of that office and embarks on a bold and unexpected new life path of using her Femininity in the Weaponized manner (read: booty shake) to make Jack feel bad for standing her up at the launch party (read: in lieu of actually confronting her father). And that's all she wrote! Wow! This shit really works! I got a feeling not a single bad or sad thing will afflict the young Lemarchal scion ever again!

Otherwise, Stuff is Rough! And you don't need me to tell that. Emily certainly doesn't, with the way Aiden's going around being a prick (that being, because he has the hornies for her) and Jack certainly doesn't with the way Aiden's going around being a prick sort-of on Emily's behalf (that being, on the business end of a louisville slugger), and Victoria certainly doesn't, with the way Emily makes her waste whole Sundays on dress fittings which should be a holy and sacred event not something you invite the sweaty poors too--that being, did Emily really have to come? I know it's for her wedding but.......................--and Danny certainly doesn't with the way he, hit harder by these eddying tides than anyone else,  desperately wants to spend his day off watching Air Buddies 3: Space Buddies but he can't because it's child-locked inside a tempting hutch and none of the Martha's will come over to  Emily's beach house to open it for him.

Look, it's not going to be easy from here on out. You know it. I know it. Everyone with anything but a potato perched upon their neck stalk knows it. So let's just try to think about, on the plus side, how many "ships" this episode "christens" (did I use that right??) when weaponized femiWINity of MarGack's flares bright enough for even the upstairs Emily voyeurs to see and volleys its opening kiss gambit straight into the laps of PatLan's "well I don't exactly trust you with all the creepy stuff you did but I guess we're here so let's take our shirts off and see what these nips end up doing."

Oh PatLan, we all knew exactly what those nips were going to do since the very start.




*clenches fist*

*whispers* ...rub like the devil hisself...

Topics for Consideration:

A Toxic Brew Of Social Misgivings
You Are My Plasma Rifle (But Also So's My Penis)
Victoria's Marinara Trench Backup Plan
Clams For Days
The Feelings BUTTcony

Direct download: Revengecast_S03E05_-_Control.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 6:40pm EST

It's time for the Downtown Nemuru Ultimate Anime Sleepytime Challenge: Fall 2016 Edition!

Hold onto your seats, because it's time for a life or death struggle where Graziella's mettle is put to the absolute test as she wends and winds a labyrinthine of real and user-submitted anime titles in an quest to determine the very essence of Reality and Falsehood!

(thanks to all the listeners who submitted titles, I'm pretty sure I got them all in!)

And don't forget, tomorrow, November 5th, is our 24 (25??!?!) hour charity live stream for Planned Parenthood which I can give you my iron-clad guarentee will contain no weird anime about butt fighting.

Direct download: MorningBrew005.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:27am EST

It's time for our yearly 24 (25?!?!) hour charity video game stream over at! You can donate at, suggest at, and generally find more information over at or See you then!

Direct download: BD4PP2016Promo.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:03pm EST

Strap yourself in, because this reboot of a revered Tom Selleck/Steve Guttenberg/That Other Guy vehicle (Four Podcasters... And A Baby??) is going to be a bumpy ride!

In this total mess of an episode about a total slog of an episode, after we finish our roundabout promo of Erin's new kickstarter about a VR Puppet Murder Mystery Game, the horses are really off to the races! By which I mean: there's baby sounds till the cows come home and a crapload of general clatter and shuffling and kicking because I still don't have a great solution for micing an entire room in our tiny Brooklyn apartment. Hey, it's just like the old days of Fast Karate in here, where the sound was not very great, the interruptions were frequent, and we accidentally fell into talking about anime (whoops!)

Soundly disproving Erin's(Borrowed) Greater Anime Cyclic Return Theory, Revenge is not a show about psychics (it's also not a cartoon, so I'm not sure why we keep bringing up this thing in the first place??) Revenge IS a show where Victoria always comes out on top, even when you think she's on the bottom. Like, show of hands if you were all "damn, no way Vicky's gonna get out of this public shaming" but then you were like "gosh! the threads of fate are surely intricate and deep as time itself." By the end of the episode, I think we all learned something... but mostly it was episodes focused mostly on many-threaded Conrad subplots are like a many-headed hydra whose many heads expel a sleeping gaze breath attack.

(Noah also wanted everyone to know that those nerdlingers in Stranger Things defeating a Demogorgon with a mere single fireball attack was supremely unlikely)

Also by the end of the episode: Emily does a bummy flip off a dusty car, Jack learns a dark lesson on morality from a certain George A. Romero, Nolan breaches a sacred oath and pays the ultimate price (and gets himself some ulterior smooches in the process), good old Ron Takeda looks into Franchising from Beyond the Grave, Aiden is right back to going Maybe Traitor mere minutes after being declared Definitely Not A Traitor, Victoria is Giving Her Boss The Ole Lightbulb (you know which one I'm talkin' about), and we babble on too long about American Comic Books, a topic none of us can speak on with any significance... but that's never stopped us before!! Full steam ahead! Even in the grips of a limitlessly laggardly liminal space, the Revengecast train stops for no one, because, even in an episode of Revenge where nothing happens, seemingly, actually, everything happens, and we've got just the people to tell you what everything was!

(it's us)

(and the everything was actually nothing)

Topics for Consideration:

Ye Olde Revenge Flim Flam
You're Being A Real Danny About This
Real Housewives of Dune
Conrad's Family Meeting
Waldo Heraldo Faldo
PIZZA. P-I-Z-Z....

Direct download: Revengecast_S03E04_-_Mercy.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:53pm EST

It's the Revengecast so nice we had to... record it in two sessions??? So thanks a lot, in order of importance: my treacherous lungs, the cars and helicopters of Brooklyn, and our upstairs neighbor, the perennial bass player.

But we're not gonna let that slow us down (well, not more than usual) and neither should you! Because... I guess things happen in this episode?

No wait, they definitely do! With the rate that people are wearing pinstripe vests with no shirts all over this island while they talk on their cellphones in public spaces which is very rude, you hardly have a minute to catch your breath! I certainly didn't! Why, I was certifiably gobsmacked by the Danny's constant attempts to undermine Margaux's Margthority, and that's saying nothing of Conrad's sudden reflection on a certain indoor-outdoor structure that is not for the public's use, and this isn't the first time, I've had to warn you plebians about it so get to stepping.

Wait no, don't get to stepping! Or--fine, DON'T listen to me! Just for that, Conrad, for the ne plus ultra crime of NOT LISTENING TO ME WHEN I SAY STUFF AND MAKE GOOD POINTS, I've decided to kill you if it's the last thing I do, I swears it, I 2x swears it, here is my signed affidavit where I state "I intend to murder Conrad Grayson in a spectacular and dramatically ironic fashion, signed below, Victoria Grayson." How could that possibly blow up in my face? I really doubt it should and/or would!

Yes, as the explosive violence spills out into the streets of the sleepy Hamptons (well, one particular street, anyway), the #AidenFaces are so sharp you could cut 4k resolution with 'em and the Collar Watch: Dolphins of Montauk Editions are simply to die for--though, honestly, I could've done without Jack being so weird about his inseam in front of Shallot (and I could've done without Shallot at all, IYKWIM *AIR HORN AIR HORN AIR HORN AIR HORN*).

And hey, if nothing else, you always gotta give that plucky little network drama we like to call Revenge credit for its Efficient Use of Robed Friars on a Limited Budget (I guess they spent all their money this season on that Ferrari which has definitely been mentioned before in the show and wasn't just shoe-horned in as a convenient plot twist), if not its strangely Canid-Focus Conceptions of what constitutes Common Law Marriage.

Hey, it's a Revengecast!

...d-d-d-d-d-do you guys hear something...? 😱

Topics for Consideration:

Tricky Tricks In The Confessional Booth & Other Emily Thorne Capers
Manufactured Murder Meet Cutes
The Jack Porter Ultimate Feeling-Crush Strike
Victoria’s Hissatsu 100% Sure Kill Anti-Emily Device
The Ivan Schwartzmann Debacle

Direct download: Revengecast_S03E03_-_Confession.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 6:29pm EST

ffti Download here Join us, your friends from the internet, in a questioncast! If you'd like to be on the next one, send your question to! If you'd like there to actually be a next one, share this around so more people will listen to it and we'll actually get questions!
If you have the time, write us a review on iTunes using this link. iTunes reviews are a big factor in discovery metrics, and all it takes is a sentence to help us grow! This Week's Major Skews: Get a Meat Thermometer Tweeter Panic! Jobs vs. Vocation ~GottaProtectors~GottaProtectors~GottaProtectors~ See you next time, kids!
Direct download: FriendsFromTheInternet_008.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 7:21pm EST


Listen Up!

This time on Revengecast, concerns of timely departures are swept aside as we spend like fifty minutes talking about random junk like Stranger Things, You're Next, Deus Ex, renowned chair orator Clint Eastwood (FOR SOME REASON) before getting to the actual meat of the matter, namely that Emily Thorne dipped one toe too many into the holy water basin and has now found herself embroiled in the highest stake game the Revenge casino has on offer: Kitten or Not Kitten?? Don't let the constantly bemused expression, overwhelming compassion, endless charity outreach, and John Ritter-esque hair part fool you, Emily--that Father Paul is No Kitten. 

Or maybe he is?? Like, after all, that's the whole point of the game! And with a priest's reputation on the line, Emily finds herself surprised by her wavering self-righteousness--oh wait, that's not self-doubt! That's Nolan futilely chiming the Bell of Conscience & Everyday Basic Human Decency in your ear! WARE, EMILY! WARE! TRAIPSE DOWN NOT THIS THORNY PATH OF REVENGETH, LEST AN INNOCENT MAN YE DAMN, AND IN THE PROCESS, SUBMIT YE THY MARRED SOUL TO THE UNBOUNDED TORMENTS OF YON NYOLAN CAT TILL THE END OF THINE DAYS & BEYOND!

Well anyway, regardless of your feelings on a certain Padre Paolo and his felid aspect (or lack thereof), you have to admit that sin is running rampant all over this island. Dresses are falling off shoulders, clandestine yacht deals are brokered, Nolan's developed six new ways to describe hacking since he's not allowed to actually do any of it (and, let's be real about it folks, they're almost certainly double entendres for masturbation), Victoria is making weird implications about where she's going to be during Patrick's honeymoon (it's implicit in her statement), PEOPLE SOMEHOW REMEMBER FRANK EXISTED AND WE KNOW THAT BECAUSE THEY MENTION HIM BY NAME FOR SOME REASON, Conrad is "Getting" "Drunk" at the De Facto Family Summit, if you get what I'm implying (Emily is drugging him, is what I'm implying), and his ensuing grumpiness (and glass breaky-ness) causes a heart-struck Charlotte to seriously consider making a modest withdrawal from the Daughter Bank (that is to say: herself). Like whatever! That threat would've hit a lot harder if it weren't delivered by Ms. Casual Pony 2013. Face it, Charlotte, you lost what little Daughter Cache you had when you traded in your leather tights for yoga pants.

But if ever an arrow could pierce the seam in Conrad's armor, it's the extremely temporary threat of voided daughter admiration, so, after sobering up, his next move is to attain the conscience that Emily couldn't and scoot on down to the rain-washed steps of the darkened abbey in the middle of the night to have his confession heard by a conveniently proximate Father Paul--the Revenge Target (and Possible Kitten) Du Jour, in case you forgot. Yikes! That's a collision course in the making if I ever saw one! And so, as her Revenge mine cart barrels down a rickety track made of joyful puppies held by a perennially scowling Jack Porter, it's time for Emily Thorne to make a decision: KITTEN OR NOT KITTEN???

Topics for Consideration:

The Impracticality Of Robo-Racism "Cooking the Blueberries" The Mysterious Smallventures of Tiny Winona Ryder Moe For Margaux! That Part Where Fight Club Realizes He's Brad Pitt Only It's Emily & She's Every Antagonist In The Show To Date Seen The Vagina Bones On That Boy??

Target Status:

revanched2 If you have the time, write us a review on iTunes using this link. iTunes reviews are a big factor in discovery metrics, and all it takes is a sentence to help us grow!
Direct download: Revengecast_S03E02_-_Sin.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 5:59pm EST